Is porn use a problem?
Refractory period, and choices
"Claims of a strong relationship between pornography use and sexual dysfunction are generally unfounded"
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This was a conclusion in an article reviewing nearly 30 different studies, titled Pornography and Sexual Dysfunction: Is There Any Relationship? published in February 2024 in the journal Current Sexual Health Reports.
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That said, some guys have become compulsive in their use of porn, spend much of their day using it, and find it difficult to reduce the time they spend on it. This is something we can talk about.
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Also, if you are consistently choosing porn over your partner, this may either lead to a problem in your relationship due to you not being sexually available to your partner, or it may be an indication that there is already a problem in your relationship, thus the preference of choosing to use porn over connecting with your partner. This is also something we can talk about.
Sometimes what men perceive or label as erectile dysfunction is actually just a normal delay called the refractory period.
So often, guys worry that watching porn (and usually masturbating at the same time) will negatively impact their sex life when it involves partnered sex.
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Sometimes the idea that there is a problem is actually a case of unrealistic expectations.
For example, the refractory period is the time after orgasm when men won't be as aroused or have the same quality of erection. This delay to 'recharge' is normal, whether you've had sex or masturbated, and is experienced by almost all guys* - only the duration of this time varies from guy to guy, and sometimes from time to time with the same guy, and the duration of this refractory period tends to get longer as men age.
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What is often found to problematic, is not being aroused or able to get an erection with a partner, some time after masturbation with porn. So, generally speaking, porn isn't the problem, it's the expectation that you will be ready for sex during your natural refractory period.
You simply have to decide what you want to do, and be realistic about your expectations, your choices and their consequences.
* There are some exceptions to this, and some men are multi-orgasmic and do not necessarily experience 'detumescence' (get soft) after orgasm. This may occur naturally, or be learned.
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